MCS stands for Melbourne CPAP Services. I was referred to this business by my sleep specialist, because I'd been diagnosed with sleep apnoea and I required a CPAP machine.

I'd heard quite a number of stories about what a nuisance CPAP machines are to use, so I was not looking forward to it. I have to be honest and say there's a lot of truth in those stories, and I will never enjoy having to use a CPAP machine. No one in their right mind would use one if they didn't have to. But if you do have to, a good therapist can make all the difference to whether you will persevere with it or not - and Geraldine from MCS's Preston branch is such a therapist.

MCS allows you to hire the machine and mask before you buy them. I don't know whether all suppliers allow you to hire before you buy, but if yours doesn't, and merely puts the hard word on you to buy, then go somewhere else. There are several types of machine out there, and many different types of mask, and you can't possibly know which ones are suitable for you until you try them. And that means sleeping with them, for at least a few nights and preferably a few weeks. Trying them out in the CPAP shop isn't enough. It's nowhere near enough. Take the mask, for instance: you have no idea how uncomfortable a mask can be until you've spent a whole night with it on your face. A mask that felt quite OK for a few minutes in the shop can feel like hell after a few hours, and if you've already bought it, you're stuck with it.

Same goes for the machine. Even if you have very deep pockets and decide to buy the most expensive model, it's not necessarily going to be the one that's right for you. A reputable CPAP supplier will deduct part or all of the hiring fee from the purchase price if you decide to buy. (MCS does.) From memory, I tried two different machines and three different masks before I settled on the ones I decided to buy.

Some machines monitor your breathing, count how many apnoeas and hypopnoeas you have during the night, and store this data, so that you can download it onto a data card and give it to your sleep doctor. They cost (at the time I bought my machine) about $1000 more than the machines that don't do this. I ended up buying the machine that does store this data, because the CPAP therapy wasn't (and still isn't) making any difference to my daytime sleepiness, and my doctor needed to be sure that the machine was effectively treating the apnoea (and it was), and the only way he could know this was by examining the data. But some people start using their machine in the trial period and suddenly find they bounce out of bed each morning filled with energy. I think they could fairly confidently assume that the therapy is working - they probably don't need the data to prove it, and they could save themselves a lot of money by buying the cheaper machine. That's one reason why you should hire before you buy.

There are machines which deliver air at a steady, continuous pressure all night (CPAP - the C is for Continuous), and others which adjust the pressure up or down depending on how blocked your airway is (APAP - the A is for Automatic). APAPs are more expensive, and you may not need one. My sleep doctor examined the data from my trial period on an APAP machine, and found that most of the time it was setting itself to a single pressure. So I ended up buying a CPAP machine rather than an APAP and I saved myself a bit of money. Another reason to hire before you buy.

The single most important component, in my opinion, is the mask. That's where the rubber hits the road, so to speak. If your mask is uncomfortable, you're going to find all sorts of excuses to avoid using the machine, and the whole thing will be a waste of money. Don't be discouraged if you have to try several different masks before you find one you can tolerate. There's a staggering range of masks out there, for all head sizes, shapes, and personal preferences. Yet another reason to hire before you buy.

Actual conversation (or something pretty close to it) between me and Geraldine, my CPAP therapist:

Me (already annoyed at having to wear the damn mask, and getting more annoyed by the minute): "This mask is horribly uncomfortable during the night. It hurts my nose, and I can't keep it in place."

Geraldine: "Hmmm. I thought we might have trouble with that mask. You have an unusually shaped head."

Me: "How so?"

Geraldine: "Well... it's kind of small."

Me: "Oh, really? Just call me Pinhead, then!"

Geraldine: "Well, maybe not small... it's more... sort of flat."

Me: "Even better! Just call me Flathead!"

Geraldine: "Well, maybe it's not your head that's the problem. You have very shiny hair, so this mask slides around a bit."

Me: "Hey, everyone! Flathead is available to do shampoo commercials!"

But we did eventually find a mask I could live with, so I'm sure there are masks out there to fit all the Pinheads, Flatheads, Coneheads, Squareheads, and all the other types of heads in the world.

Needless to say, I was not the most pleasant customer that Geraldine had ever had. In fact, I was fairly grumpy at times. But Geraldine is probably used to grumpy customers. Let's face it, no one goes into a CPAP shop all happy and smiling because they've developed a sudden fetish for sleeping every night with a CPAP mask clamped onto their face. Most people are probably fairly gloomy about the prospect. Geraldine was unfailingly pleasant, no matter how grumpy I got, she was endlessly patient, and she was full of good ideas and helpful advice.

For instance, I once complained that I tended to sleep with my face turned into the pillow a lot, and that made the mask move out of position and I'd wake up with air blasting against my cheek. "Then you need to stop rolling onto your side," said Geraldine. "How do I do that?" I snarled. "I'm asleep! I can't control how I roll around!" "With a bolster," said Geraldine. "Oh, great. Something else I have to buy," I said. "Not at all," said Geraldine. And she explained how to make a bolster: take an old pillow, fold it in half, and stuff both halves down a pillowcase so that you have one half of the pillowcase stuffed full of double-thickness pillow, and the other half empty. Then sleep on top of the empty half, with the fat half wedged beside you so you can't roll on your side. Simple.

With luck, you'll never need a CPAP machine. But if you do, and you live anywhere near Preston, I can recommend this branch. I can't say the experience of using a CPAP machine will be enjoyable - it isn't for me - but with expert help it can be made bearable, and I think Geraldine at MCS Preston has helped make it as bearable as it's ever going to get.